Funeral Arrangements

You may have already made some of the arrangements for the funeral of your loved one such as choosing the funeral directors and, in liaison with the priest, arranging the date and time of the funeral. Your priest will help you with any of the ongoing arrangements that may need to be made.

The Prayer Vigil

This vigil is held in church and is usually called the reception of the body. The evening before the funeral the body of your loved one is brought into church with readings from scripture and prayers. The mood of the vigil is one of quiet support and prayer. This service is optional and lasts approximately 15 minutes. Any devotional prayers, or a time of prayer afterwards, can be arranged.

The Funeral

This is the main service of the funeral. Ordinarily this would be a Requiem Mass, because the Mass is the greatest prayer the Church can offer for the person who has died. In the Mass we unite our prayers with the sacrifice of Christ, asking God to forgive the sins of the deceased and to welcome them into eternal life. For this reason, it is normally best for the funeral to take place within Mass whenever this is possible.

On some occasions, however, it may be that a funeral service outside of Mass is more suitable. This can depend on the circumstances of the family, the wishes of the deceased, or practical considerations. You can discuss which option is most appropriate when you meet with the priest, who will help you decide what is best in your situation.

The funeral will usually take place in church but, if it is not a Mass, it may sometimes be appropriate to hold it in the chapel of the cemetery or crematorium immediately before the committal.

The Committal

The funeral concludes with a service at the graveside or at the crematorium. This is the final act of saying farewell, in which the Church prays with faith and hope as your loved one is commended to Almighty God. In these prayers we entrust the deceased to the mercy of God and ask that they may be received into the Kingdom of Heaven, where every tear is wiped away and death is no more.

When burial takes place, the body is laid to rest in the ground, in the sure and certain hope of the resurrection of the dead. When cremation is chosen, the Church still offers the same prayers of commendation, asking God to receive the person who has died and to grant them eternal rest.

At a crematorium, families are sometimes asked by funeral directors whether they would like the curtain to close at the end of the service. From pastoral experience, it is best for the curtain to be closed. Although this can feel difficult in the moment, it helps people psychologically to recognise that the final farewell has taken place, and it can give a clearer sense of closure. For this reason, the closing of the curtain is strongly recommended, unless there is a strong reason not to do so.

If a body is cremated, there is usually a further brief service at a later time for the burial of the ashes. This continues the Church's prayer for the faithful departed and marks the final laying to rest of the person who has died.

Burial of Ashes

When cremation has taken place, the Catholic Church teaches that the cremated remains must be treated with the same respect as the body. For this reason, ashes should be buried in a grave or placed in a columbarium or other suitable resting place. They should not be kept at home, divided between family members, or scattered. The burial of ashes is an important act of faith, showing our belief in the dignity of the human person and in the resurrection of the body at the last day.

If the ashes have not yet been buried, you are encouraged to arrange this as soon as possible. A priest is very happy to come to the cemetery or place of burial to pray the proper prayers of the Church. There is no fee for this. If you would like to arrange the burial of ashes, please contact the parish and we will be glad to help.

The Eulogy

A eulogy is a short reflection on the life of the person who has died. It is an opportunity to give thanks for their life, to remember what they meant to their family and friends, and to acknowledge the good that they did.

The eulogy should be written in full beforehand by the family, since they are the ones who knew and loved the person who has died. The eulogy should be suitable for a church setting, remembering that the funeral takes place in the presence of God.

The eulogy should not normally be longer than 500 words. If more than one person wishes to contribute, this is permitted, but the total length must remain within this limit. There is a strict policy that the eulogy must contain no bad language, no jokes or stories that would be inappropriate in a church, and no negative or critical comments about the person who has died. The words spoken should always reflect the respect due to the church and the sacredness of the occasion.

The eulogy must always be sent to the priest in advance of the funeral so that it can be read beforehand.

Although the eulogy is written by the family, it does not have to be read by a family member. If there is any doubt at all about whether someone will feel able to read it on the day, it is usually better for it to be read by the priest or a family friend on their behalf. This will not only allow the eulogy to be appreciated better by the congregation, but it will also allow the family member to take in the funeral rather than burden pressure and distress onto themselves.

Music

Music is important in the funeral and carefully selected hymns and music will enhance the funeral, bring back memories of a loved one and provide consolation for you, your family and friends.

The only music allowed in church, whether during mass or a service, are hymns or music without words.

Please see our hymns page for a selection of hymns that we recommend.

Readings

The readings at the funeral are always taken from the Holy Bible. There is a first reading, usually from the Old Testament, a Psalm and a Gospel. A second reading from the New Testament can also be chosen.

If you would like to choose readings for the funeral you can see our readings page. The priest or the deacon will read the Gospel, Catholic family and friends can read the other readings and the bidding prayers.

Order of Service

Many families choose to have an order of service printed for the funeral. This helps the congregation to follow the funeral, but it is also a good memorial for people to take away with them so they can remember the deceased and pray for them.

Some families choose to have the order of service printed by the funeral directors, others by a different printing company and other families produce their own. Whichever option you choose, your priest will help you by putting together the contents (words only) once you have met and discussed the options for music, and readings.